(Disclaimer: The incidents described below are liberal mix of fiction with personal experience. Its a kind of based on a true story where the gaps in the story have been filled in with liberal dramatizations. Any coincidences with reality are, of course, purely intentional.)
Scene 1: May 2, 1999
S****** F****** was typing fast late in the light. The New Salem lights were dim outside. He had to submit his assignment in a few minutes and he had not even looked at the figures. Even if he had looked, he had precious little time to figure out anything.
The case-analysis was of the legendary 'Netscape's IPO'. Unlike the usual Harvard cases that start with a tensed executive staring philosophically out of the window, this one came straight to the point. Netscape wanted to get an IPO out. They had never made any money. All other sources of finance were dry. They decided to approach the stock markets. And dotcom gold diggers on wall street wanted the stock more badly than ever......
So, the question was what should be the price of a Netscape share. It primarily highlighted the difficulties faced in valuing a company where you know next to nothing about the company or the industry's future.
'God, thank you for creating excel with the drag and copy feature for the formulae', he thought as he put in his assignment for the day. For a 10 minute job, the excel could not have been better. However, it lacked any fundamental correlations with reality. A sane mind, with one reading of the case, could do no more than keeping hitting the delete button in frustration - hopelessly trying to eliminate all memory of the horrible effort.
Perhaps the professor will not actually verify the figures. Perhaps no one will look at the excel sheet. After all, you could have justified everything......
Scene 2: Between May 2, 1999 and June 4, 2007
Professor J****** W***** was sitting in his office gazing philosophically at the boston snow outside, imagining himself as the hero of a Harvard case study. An imperceptible sigh escaped his breath as he found himself battered with the meetings of the day. The case at the edge of the table caught his glance.
'Why did Netscape have to come out with that IPO. More so, why did they actually think someone could value it. Perhaps they wanted to enhance your number juggling skills......... does it really matter? Enough people can take care of these trifles without me wasting time over it.'
In another room, the screen of the TA jingled with a 'you have got mail' sign. The TA had actually recieved two mails. The first one confirming his evening out and the second one from the professor.
'What does that slave-driver want now? Another one of those stupid assignments with reams of excels and arbitrary powerpoints.'
As he gave a long look to the six pages of IPO pricing difficulties, it dawned on him that he would have to cancel that date. But perhaps there was some hope. The irony was not lost on him as he plugged on his netscape to search 'previous opinions' on the case. And he hit paydirt......... F*******.xls . A whole excel, with the the numbers crunched and digested. It looked a bit rough on the edges but any checking would only waste time.
Virtually anything under the sun could be written and argued for. Who's gonna read it anyway!
CTRL C and CTRL V with a little know-how of IPO underpricing, make for a good 4 slide ppt and a saved date.
Scene 3: August 3, 2007
'Triskaidekaphobia!' - exclaimed the t-shirt in and around Hostel 13 at II* L******. The grounds outside smelled of the fresh Lucknowi showers. A host of bugs pursued the incandescent lamps everywhere, mistaking them for the moon.
In one room of that hostel, a group of 5 students was pondering over the future of the cement industry. At least trying to, in the sultry dampness of a rainy monsoon.
Suddenly, another one torpedoed into the sage meeting, oblivious to all serenity. He was obviously excited.
I got a google. It's done by a professor. Some J*** W****. I don't think we need to check it.
The relief in the voice was palpable. It amounted to saving one more hour. They really needed that, if not for themselves, then for the cement industry. But all of them were not equally ethically challenged.
Abey excel toh bana le! (At least make the excel!)
The chiding remark ricocheted of the room walls. An eerie silence prevailed. Ethical uncertainity and the cement industry, the devil and the black sea - the choices were not very pleasing.
I have read the case. I have practically followed netscape from then on to its present avatar as FF. You can make an argument for any price. Change the growth rates here, the discount rates there and you can have a figure from 15-50. It's not worth spending any time over...
But the argument was not pervasive.
Then it's even better! The excel will not take more than 10 minutes.
The new entrant was tired, defeated. He retreated. He might as well as confirm the numbers with the case. He picked up the case and started checking the excel sheet. And then, he saw what S******* F****** thought no one will.
WTF!!
The story would have ended here, but it did not.
Scene 4: August 4, 2007
'WTF!!'
Expletives are not the most common words one mouths in class. But today was a groundbreaking day. A day which shook beliefs and reaffirmed the worst fears. A day which answered, 'Yes, the sky is breaking down and its gonna fall on you' and 'Yes, everyone is out to get you'.
It had all started with yesterday's announcement in class.
He's gone mad!
People will not read even one!
How will he complete it in 75 minutes ?
These were some of the sentences being bandied around the previous day. The voices were as incredulous as they were distressed. Some bright soul of a professor, going around by the name of A*** G***, had decided to give Harvard a run for its money.
Harvard pioneered the case study method. We will now teach them how to F*** Forward with case discussions.
These were his thoughts. OR perhaps he had an essential faith in their collective incompetency, which prompted the projection that there will be no discussion. There was no other reason why a sane individual would assume that 4 cases can be analyzed and discussed in a 75 minute class. The cases were small, but pretty complex in themselves, as in no one could precisely pinpoint even the issues involved. How do you predict for example, what valuation was correct for Netscape?
The group from Hostel 13 were sitting in the class with the new, modified, corrected and embellished solution. All thoughts concentrated on Netscape now. It was not perfect but was as near perfect as the group could take it.
Group * , can you make the presentation
The feeling of relief was as deep as it was imperceptible on all faces except of Group *. They had been called on to deliver judgment.
Dot com companies.. Business Model... IPO pricing.. blah.. blah
The torpodoing retreater of hostel 13 was sitting in this class. A sudden smile passed his lips as he saw the xls. He could not believe it. Yes, it was modified. It was clean of all mistakes. But the assumptions. They were unmistakably close. Others had done the same thing he had tried to attempt in his hostel, he mused. Hail Google! The source of one. The source of all. A patina of relief masked his face as Group * ended and A*** G*** started speaking.
Hopefully, a sane solution. Let's hope we get to learn here.
The mouse pointer moved towards the file. He could hear the click when it was selected and opened. The bits moved from the cpu to the projector at approximately the speed of light. From there to 70 pairs of eyes, they moved at the speed of light. The ones and the zeros arranged themselves to form a comprehensible display of numbers on screen. The optic nerve raced through with the numbers to the frontal cortex. The temporal lobe accessed the decidedly short term memory. As the excel sheet opened, his face lost all colour.
WTF!!
That was not the only or even the first expletive brought in by the excel sheet. This xls, the one the professor had brought to class was not even modified or corrected. It took time to sink in.
Ye bhi! (Him too !)
Hurried glances were exchanged throughout the class. Everyone knew what was wrong. They had spent the whole day trying to correct it!
And then the class attacked. If S***** F****** would have known 70 pairs of eyes were gonna go into a deepdive analysis of his excel, perhaps he would have been careful with the drag and drop. Or perhaps, J*** W****'s TA would have missed his date if he had witnessed the slaughter. The prof had not expected anyone to actually read the case. The tension was reflected in the beads of sweat on his face. The humiliation was evident as the case was dismissed hurriedly to be looked on at later (meaning never). He wondered, perhaps like all criminals do, when caught red-handed.
How do they know!
As the class exchanged smiles, they understood the unspoken fact. Everyone knew. Everyone read. Everyone googled.
(Some links which might be of interest:
http://www.wfu.edu/~palmitar/Law&Valuation/Papers/1999/FREITAS.XLS
http://www.wfu.edu/~palmitar/Law&Valuation/Papers/1999/freitas.html
http://web.cba.neu.edu/~jwelch/PPT/Netscape%20IPO.ppt
)
Scene 1: May 2, 1999
S****** F****** was typing fast late in the light. The New Salem lights were dim outside. He had to submit his assignment in a few minutes and he had not even looked at the figures. Even if he had looked, he had precious little time to figure out anything.
The case-analysis was of the legendary 'Netscape's IPO'. Unlike the usual Harvard cases that start with a tensed executive staring philosophically out of the window, this one came straight to the point. Netscape wanted to get an IPO out. They had never made any money. All other sources of finance were dry. They decided to approach the stock markets. And dotcom gold diggers on wall street wanted the stock more badly than ever......
So, the question was what should be the price of a Netscape share. It primarily highlighted the difficulties faced in valuing a company where you know next to nothing about the company or the industry's future.
'God, thank you for creating excel with the drag and copy feature for the formulae', he thought as he put in his assignment for the day. For a 10 minute job, the excel could not have been better. However, it lacked any fundamental correlations with reality. A sane mind, with one reading of the case, could do no more than keeping hitting the delete button in frustration - hopelessly trying to eliminate all memory of the horrible effort.
Perhaps the professor will not actually verify the figures. Perhaps no one will look at the excel sheet. After all, you could have justified everything......
Scene 2: Between May 2, 1999 and June 4, 2007
Professor J****** W***** was sitting in his office gazing philosophically at the boston snow outside, imagining himself as the hero of a Harvard case study. An imperceptible sigh escaped his breath as he found himself battered with the meetings of the day. The case at the edge of the table caught his glance.
'Why did Netscape have to come out with that IPO. More so, why did they actually think someone could value it. Perhaps they wanted to enhance your number juggling skills......... does it really matter? Enough people can take care of these trifles without me wasting time over it.'
In another room, the screen of the TA jingled with a 'you have got mail' sign. The TA had actually recieved two mails. The first one confirming his evening out and the second one from the professor.
'What does that slave-driver want now? Another one of those stupid assignments with reams of excels and arbitrary powerpoints.'
As he gave a long look to the six pages of IPO pricing difficulties, it dawned on him that he would have to cancel that date. But perhaps there was some hope. The irony was not lost on him as he plugged on his netscape to search 'previous opinions' on the case. And he hit paydirt......... F*******.xls . A whole excel, with the the numbers crunched and digested. It looked a bit rough on the edges but any checking would only waste time.
Virtually anything under the sun could be written and argued for. Who's gonna read it anyway!
CTRL C and CTRL V with a little know-how of IPO underpricing, make for a good 4 slide ppt and a saved date.
Scene 3: August 3, 2007
'Triskaidekaphobia!' - exclaimed the t-shirt in and around Hostel 13 at II* L******. The grounds outside smelled of the fresh Lucknowi showers. A host of bugs pursued the incandescent lamps everywhere, mistaking them for the moon.
In one room of that hostel, a group of 5 students was pondering over the future of the cement industry. At least trying to, in the sultry dampness of a rainy monsoon.
Suddenly, another one torpedoed into the sage meeting, oblivious to all serenity. He was obviously excited.
I got a google. It's done by a professor. Some J*** W****. I don't think we need to check it.
The relief in the voice was palpable. It amounted to saving one more hour. They really needed that, if not for themselves, then for the cement industry. But all of them were not equally ethically challenged.
Abey excel toh bana le! (At least make the excel!)
The chiding remark ricocheted of the room walls. An eerie silence prevailed. Ethical uncertainity and the cement industry, the devil and the black sea - the choices were not very pleasing.
I have read the case. I have practically followed netscape from then on to its present avatar as FF. You can make an argument for any price. Change the growth rates here, the discount rates there and you can have a figure from 15-50. It's not worth spending any time over...
But the argument was not pervasive.
Then it's even better! The excel will not take more than 10 minutes.
The new entrant was tired, defeated. He retreated. He might as well as confirm the numbers with the case. He picked up the case and started checking the excel sheet. And then, he saw what S******* F****** thought no one will.
WTF!!
The story would have ended here, but it did not.
Scene 4: August 4, 2007
'WTF!!'
Expletives are not the most common words one mouths in class. But today was a groundbreaking day. A day which shook beliefs and reaffirmed the worst fears. A day which answered, 'Yes, the sky is breaking down and its gonna fall on you' and 'Yes, everyone is out to get you'.
It had all started with yesterday's announcement in class.
He's gone mad!
People will not read even one!
How will he complete it in 75 minutes ?
These were some of the sentences being bandied around the previous day. The voices were as incredulous as they were distressed. Some bright soul of a professor, going around by the name of A*** G***, had decided to give Harvard a run for its money.
Harvard pioneered the case study method. We will now teach them how to F*** Forward with case discussions.
These were his thoughts. OR perhaps he had an essential faith in their collective incompetency, which prompted the projection that there will be no discussion. There was no other reason why a sane individual would assume that 4 cases can be analyzed and discussed in a 75 minute class. The cases were small, but pretty complex in themselves, as in no one could precisely pinpoint even the issues involved. How do you predict for example, what valuation was correct for Netscape?
The group from Hostel 13 were sitting in the class with the new, modified, corrected and embellished solution. All thoughts concentrated on Netscape now. It was not perfect but was as near perfect as the group could take it.
Group * , can you make the presentation
The feeling of relief was as deep as it was imperceptible on all faces except of Group *. They had been called on to deliver judgment.
Dot com companies.. Business Model... IPO pricing.. blah.. blah
The torpodoing retreater of hostel 13 was sitting in this class. A sudden smile passed his lips as he saw the xls. He could not believe it. Yes, it was modified. It was clean of all mistakes. But the assumptions. They were unmistakably close. Others had done the same thing he had tried to attempt in his hostel, he mused. Hail Google! The source of one. The source of all. A patina of relief masked his face as Group * ended and A*** G*** started speaking.
Hopefully, a sane solution. Let's hope we get to learn here.
The mouse pointer moved towards the file. He could hear the click when it was selected and opened. The bits moved from the cpu to the projector at approximately the speed of light. From there to 70 pairs of eyes, they moved at the speed of light. The ones and the zeros arranged themselves to form a comprehensible display of numbers on screen. The optic nerve raced through with the numbers to the frontal cortex. The temporal lobe accessed the decidedly short term memory. As the excel sheet opened, his face lost all colour.
WTF!!
That was not the only or even the first expletive brought in by the excel sheet. This xls, the one the professor had brought to class was not even modified or corrected. It took time to sink in.
Ye bhi! (Him too !)
Hurried glances were exchanged throughout the class. Everyone knew what was wrong. They had spent the whole day trying to correct it!
And then the class attacked. If S***** F****** would have known 70 pairs of eyes were gonna go into a deepdive analysis of his excel, perhaps he would have been careful with the drag and drop. Or perhaps, J*** W****'s TA would have missed his date if he had witnessed the slaughter. The prof had not expected anyone to actually read the case. The tension was reflected in the beads of sweat on his face. The humiliation was evident as the case was dismissed hurriedly to be looked on at later (meaning never). He wondered, perhaps like all criminals do, when caught red-handed.
How do they know!
As the class exchanged smiles, they understood the unspoken fact. Everyone knew. Everyone read. Everyone googled.
(Some links which might be of interest:
http://www.wfu.edu/~palmitar/Law&Valuation/Papers/1999/FREITAS.XLS
http://www.wfu.edu/~palmitar/Law&Valuation/Papers/1999/freitas.html
http://web.cba.neu.edu/~jwelch/PPT/Netscape%20IPO.ppt
)
2 comments:
Too much of a post! ROTFLed am I
Also have tagged you :)
Man...so you guys gave AG his fair share of HelL ....ha!!! good good...and how is our dear old Bansal doing ??? you've got CREST??? !!
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